Consuming friends and influencing people

Disclaimer: On a scale of 1-10, the gross-out factor of this post is a solid 9. Gee. How could you resist now?

A Tale of Two Tails

We live in the sticks. Up to now, we’ve always been city people but we had a jones for living on an alpaca ranch, so here we are. It’s gorgeous out here. Woodsy Owl and I have coffee together every morning (in reusable thermal mugs, of course. Give a hoot.)

There are critters out here. Sure, there are deer, raccoons, and of course, the aplacas. They all stay outside like we expect them to. Some critters like to come inside. Like mice. Apparently that’s part of  ”country living.” Or so the neighbors tell us. Right.

We’re gentle folk. We don’t kill critters, even the ones that we really, really want to. It’s a karma thing. So we catch them and let them go about a mile away so they don’t come right back.

One night, Jenni caught three mice (while the cat stood by and purred lazily). She put them all in a large glass jar under the sink. When morning, came, we only saw two mice in the jar. Escape was not possible, so we started to imagine these were magical mice.

Until we saw… remnants. Yes. Mouse parts.

The other two mice had eaten their friend. Devoured him. Thoroughly.

We were freaked out and sickened. Sure, we get that these are animals and it’s instinctual survival stuff, but any cute qualities these creatures possessed died with the third mouse. So we still let the other two go in a field, but we signaled a passing hawk. Karma points and contributing to the Circle of Life in one go. Let’s move on, shall we?

Consuming friends and influencing people

The internet is a fantastic place for marketing, isn’t it? Everyone from small business owners to artists with etsy shops have the opportunity to reach huge audiences without a marketing budget like Coke or GM.

We also have tremendous opportunities to make new friends without leaving our chairs. Sometimes we make friends that are in our market, and sometimes they buy our stuff. We buy their stuff. We’re friends. It’s cool.

With social media, it’s even easier to make tons of friends out of people we barely know outside of their avatar and profile. Some Social Media apps even call it “friending.” It sounds nice. Friendly.

It’s so easy that we can get caught up in making scores of “friends” yet not really creating meaningful connections. Sometimes we befriend someone because they’re influential and might get us what we want; attention, a wider audience, blog readers.

I’ve done this. I hate that I’ve done this, but there’s my confession. It sickens me almost as much as finding only two mice in the jar.

Slow down, you move too fast

I’ve since realized that my mistake was not in wanting to make lots of friends. Sure I do. I love the people I hang out with on Twitter. Dude, it’s my water cooler, my cafe, my bar.

But I’m slowing down. There are formulas to follow that will build huge audiences of people and win you scads of new online “friends.” I’m sure they work.

Sales may be a numbers game, but people aren’t. You can build a massive friend base, but if you’re not actively working on those relationships then it’s just the usual marketing. What’s the hurry? Better to build relationships that will last rather than merely consuming friends to survive.

I will have fewer numbers, but stronger friends. Stronger client relationships. More meaningful work.

No annoying fur in my teeth.

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